Wednesday, October 12, 2011

It Is Finished!

What happened next seemed to take an eternity.

I was shaking uncontrollably which is apparently what most women experience in transition, but not me. This was very new and I was exhausted! I was still only effaced to 80% on one side but was ready to push.

The cramping was excruciating. The labor contractions paled in comparison. I couldn't do my fancy hypnobreathing through my contractions because the searing pain of the cramping forced me to just suffer through.

My midwife would calmly say something like "some women say it feels like cramping." Seriously. Did I look like I'd just fallen off the turnip wagon? I have done this pleeeeeenty of times to know that it has NEVER felt like that.

I couldn't take it anymore and I told her I wanted the "belt" taken off.  My midwife refused for fear that his head would bob back up like a balloon again. I'm sure I yelled something along the lines of "TAKE IT OFF!" or "I WANT IT OFF NOW!" because she conceded and removed that awful thing.

Let me just clue you in that you can't push a baby through a semi-dilated/effaced cervix. There's a reason why it has to be complete. It won't fit. So what does an amazingly knowledgeable midwife do? She reaches in and moves that cervix right out of the way. Niiiiice.

In 70 seconds this little guy was born with his fist over his face. Well no wonder there was so much cramping and no progression in labor. It's a nice round head that does all the work during contractions. Not the irregular shape of a head with a fist attached.

The pain of delivering his head, his fist, and my midwifes fist was about more than I could take. When I laid back on the bed with my breathing little bundle I could see three faces leaning over me but they were in a blurred tunnel. I was passing out.

This is the sweetest little baby that has come into our family ~ but I would push out my 10 pound Pupa any day over this little guy and two fists.
And he takes a binky! ~ Hallelujah!!